Relationship guru Roosevelt Ethridge will be my guest on the Courageous Woman Radio Show Tuesday May 20, 2014. He is a pastor, entrepreneur, and author of the book Navigating From A Broken Place, a Life Map for Love Relationship and Singleness. The show airs on ICBS Radio, 111.3 FM in Los Angles and simultaneously online at www.jranstudios.org 6 pm PST/9 pm EST every Tuesday.
Pastor Ethridge is a single father of one son. He is sought out by many for his piercing insight on the God’s Man perspective. He is a conference speaker for both men and women. In my opinion he is an awesome KEEP IT REAL expert on relationships.
Have you experienced break-up, failed relationships, or just repeating the cycle of dating frenzies. This book is an anthology of collected works that speak to areas of brokeness, lonliness, and desire. Sections like From the Mind of A Man provides insight to a man’s thought process in areas of love and relations. This section informs Women about a man’s soft side, dealing with bleeding wounds and much more. Also, in the book you will find other information such as Dealing with Failure and identifying your worth.
The half hour show was not enough to ask him all the questions I wanted to ask him. Here is a few more questions. He will also be on our facebook page after the show to answer any questions you might have
TB: What makes a man feel “safe” in trusting a woman after he’s been hurt?
RE: A man’s safety is translated into security. What makes him secure, he is not reminded about his weaknesses and time has proven that the woman has his best interest at heart. He learns that he will not be whipped with his failures, defeats, or fears by his significant other. Trust is developed over time, it is never an overnight process.
TB: Why does a man hesitate to be emotionally involved but provides a woman with everything else?
RE: We as men are not taught how to be secure or masculine by showing emotion. Therefore, we spend years learning how not to show feelings or emotion, “Tough Guy Syndrome.” This syndrome operates in a man’s mind causing him to believe that’s what a woman wants… Hidden deep in the African American culture they call this guy a “ruff neck or thug,” in other communities names like, “red neck, hood, construction worker, etc.” Men are taught that women want a man that is rough and hard with them and that is a sense of power, control and authority. However, mature women want a man that is compassionate, protective and communicative. Those attributes don’t require a man to be hard shelled, rough or inconsiderate. Therefore, his hesitation comes from his lack of understanding, fear, and society.
TB: What is a man’s true definition or example of lifelong love?
RE: A man’s true definition of lifelong love is simply “irresistible.” When a man’s comes to the understanding that he can’t live, breath or exist without the woman then it has become a lifelong commitment in his heart. Many times, he will communicate all of the wrong things, using the wrong verbiage and all before making it clear that he loves her undoubtedly. Life Long love from a man’s view is a love that helps him with his fears and pushes him towards his destiny.
TB: Why does a man have multiple women and not commit to one woman?
RE: Many times a man that has multiple women is a man who has low self-esteem and a mountain of insecurities. As a result, he uses multiple women to validate his security. Can one woman fulfill his needs, the answer is yes. However, typically because he has trust issues many times he use many women as a mask because he then becomes in control of how he trust(s) others. Meaning, he is secure with women trusting him and he finds that as heroic. Furthermore, it is a fallacy of who he really his and how he truly feels.
TB:Can a woman heal a man or help him to become healed after he’s been hurt?
RE:The answer is no. If she is helping him become healed then she doesn’t need to be in a romantic relationship with him. Wounded men are dangerous men. Men are indecisive, sporadic, and sometimes inconsiderate. Wounded men need time and space. He can look good on the outside but if he is emotionally torn then all you have is a shell. Honestly, “sex” doesn’t bring him to healing, “supporting” all of his kids needs doesn’t bring him to healing, “being a spiritual guide” doesn’t bring him to healing; healing comes with time, space and honest friendship. Helping a man through a healing process is a time where a woman should try not to “fall in love” before the man is healed.
The characteristics of a healed man are:
1. He is over hislast girlfriend.
2. He is not saying that his is in “transition” from his marriage and still married.
3. He is not taunted by his past.
4. He is able to receive love and gratitude shown towards him.
5. He doesn’t treat you as the other woman, he respects you for you.
6. He doesn’t generalize and categorize you with all women, he is able to specify and identify your uniqueness.
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